Noir School Project (Re-edited)

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maj_barnes
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Noir School Project (Re-edited)

Post by maj_barnes »

Yea, anyone remember my first college video? Well, I re-edited it: chop the time down alot. And deleted some camera shots that were required for the project (didn't save the grade though) but made the flow very clumsy. All sounds besides talking and the heavily edited gun sounds are foleyed in (yea, it took awhile. And I know the headshots sound like the guys are shitting themselves). Color corrected this sum-b to give it a very noir look (B&W then tinted blue); every shot was contrasted x1284723 to make it look more professional (go ahead and say it doesn't, I need some criticisms). I'm kinda disappointed that you could see how beutiful the sunset looked in some shots. Music in the beginning was changed to give a more forboding mood rather than ironic, end music sayed because the feeling for it was good to me.

Also included is some ragtag DVD background thing for the menu I threw together. Yea, it makes this thing look like the s***.

Anyways, tons of blank firing gun action: with what my class said to be the best camera work they've seen (I guess they haven't seen much), and of course a plot that is straight forward and doesn't waste time explaining (if you don't get it, I won't spell it out of you because that's not how it works in real life:. I know, a futal attempt at formalism). Trust me, tear this s*** apart: I want some super blunt critics'.

Enjoy the Menu. (00:27)


Enjoy the Movie. (02:35)


SPOILER (highlight below)
If you don't get the story, the two that are shot are transfering a ransom for the guy in the trunk of the car. So when the kiddnapper gets the money he has no use for the captive: so he shoots him.
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RE: Noir School Project (Re-edited)

Post by Jperson »

Lol...quite good...I wasn't to sure about the music at the end...but I'm not in a tearing-to-pieces mood at the mo ;) I'll come back and give some more critisim.
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Post by Vor »

That's preetty cool, I liked it.
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Post by UFProductions »

Alright, you should know by now that I like your style, and am usually fairly impressed with the stuff you do. That said, you did ask for some blunt criticizm, so here it is; point form notes of everything I hated!

1. The colour correction is too damn much. Yes, contrast is an easy back-door to a better look, but when you overdo it to the point where detail is lost you are missing the point, it just frustrates the viewer; it felt like I was looking at my LCD monitor from the side or something and couldn't see a thing.

2. The non-diagetic sound was shitty. The MP3 you used was full of little pops and hissing. If you're going to steal the music for your movie you might as well steal a good quality sample.

3. For christs sake steady your shots out! Half of them are locked down tripod shots which work very well; the framing is good. But then you cut to "epilepsy-cam" and I can't stand it because it's shakin' around like you're filming from a canoe on a windy day. The idea behind films is to make the viewer forget that the camera is there. This is why lense-flares are a no-no, and why if the camera isn't steady it should damn well have a better reason than "we couldn't hold it steady enough while the car was moving".

4. The head shot sound effect went on waaayyyyy too long. His head was flat on the ground and there was the sound of blood dripping. Dripping on what!? Made no sense.

5. Lastly, and I feel most importantly; TARANTINO STYLE TRUNK SHOTS = NO!

Aaaannnddd I'm done! I did feel the music at the end suited it perfectly though.

PS: The DVD menu was a waste of your time and mine... I just felt like throwing one more jab in there while I was at it! Honestly though, what was the point? It didn't even flow evenly, was there a accidental jump-cut in there?
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Post by F.F.F. »

The color correction waqs too much, it hurt my eyes.
But was the music at the end Shirley Bassey?
Good film.
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Post by Jperson »

Yah it was good, and I've been outvoted on my music opinion. :( Lol. I have to say that I agree a lot with UFProductions (ah that's nice and easy :) All done don't have to do anymore lol). Um..yeah the colour (spell it write everyone! come on!) correction was a bit over the top. And the trunk shot confused thinks a bit..It was going quite nicely then suddenly this odd occurance. As UFP said, leave it out.

And yes I am growing to like your style. Well done, generally, but as UFP said next time leave the DVD bit off coz really no one wants to see that much, because as a DVD menu it can't be too exciting with too much action other wise it would be distracting.
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Post by maj_barnes »

Thanks guys, this is the kind of criticisms I like.

Those pops and stuff came after exporting from AE, I think I maybe zeroed in on the culprit in doing so it. The DVD menu, yea it looks like there was a jump cut: but when I check it there was an absence of it (I guess the change in brightness causes the look of it).

But thanks again, I love this. :D
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Post by Gyro »

I actually thought the color correction was brilliant! And the sheer light scheme across the lens was beautiful, props to the shots on this film.
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Post by MGH »

Very good for a short film, though I wasnt really aware of why they had the suitcase or who anyone was.
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